Friday, May 13, 2005

Monkey Magical Mystery Tour Bus Station Airy

Sorry for the lack of postings. I am kind of used to my life lately, I guess. But if I keep typing, I reckon I can think of something....

I went to dinner with Mr. Miyagi's daughter. I also discovered that she is good at singing Michael Jackson songs in karaoke.

We lost another softball game and I popped out twice when facing a very fast female pitcher. She was scary. When the next pitcher came in I hit the ball high and far but the outfield was playing so deep that it was all for naught. Oh yeah, and one guy on our team was rounding third and heading home and I enthusiastically high-fived him on the way home, hoping to boost our team's morale a bit more with my foolish foreigner antics. But we were soon informed that such behavior is in fact against the rules. As a result the run was replaced by an out. Oops. Once again I must say how thankful I am that no one on our team cares at all. Although being competitive might be fun.... I tried to cry bad shoulder so I could play first base but I was denied and forced to maintain my former position in left field. No rest for the weary.

Next on the agenda that day was an all-you-can-drink beer fest, all afternoon. I decided not to go, though, because I was already too tired from other things. Maybe I am getting old. Or just wiser. which wouldn't be saying much. The previous night I had managed to convince four friends to join me to see a rock show. I know the band and wanted to support them and introduce some new people. My inside information, however, was incorrect. The performance was not Saturday but Friday. Great. So I had four unhappy starving girls to entertain.... I had promised them a concert after all. Luckily my hunch about another bar only a few subway stations away proved correct, and there was a band playing there. So we went, ate, and listened. I saw some people I know, including a certain victim of a certain unbelievable crime that might have been mentioned previously. Also I saw a really sweet girl I know who has faces of rock stars tatooed on her neck and arm, along with other things. One of the kindest girls ever, with a really hard look about her. I love that her personality and her appearance are what they are, and not what people would expect at all.

I am tired. Some other interesting people I have met recently:

A man who claims to be a professional clown whose specialty is inflating baloons with his butt. Nice guy. Said he makes about $10,000 a week. Or something like that. I think not. Rather clowny, though.... I did not ask him to show me his technique.

A guy from Jamaica who was high high high at first and then over the course of the evening became not high. Oh what a difference a few hours make. Nice talking about his culture and hearing the frank truth about things.

Two Japanese punked out chicks not long out of high school who also have the practiced tough appearance, but who have worked hard to achieve the overly cute behavior that is becoming so annoyingly popular among young Japanese girls. Hard to describe other than to say it is contrived until they forget how not to act that way. Then they get older and it seems even stranger. But I won't say it is not interesting!

A really nice young lady who happens to be employed as an exotic dancer (perfectly innocent, friend of a friend, I have never been to a strip club so there), who has just been diagnosed with cancer.

And others I am not remembering at the moment. I want to meet my pillow right now. One last person of note: Today one of my university students, when asked to do an impromptu one-minute 'show and tell' presentation, chose as his subject the monkey wrench he was carrying in his duffle bag. I think anything involving monkeys is funny. He went on about how he loves his monkey wrench, and then students had to ask him questions about it. Some that come to mind: "Do you love it?" ("Yes!") "What is your favorite size?" (He adjusted it and said, "This size!") "Why are you still awake and typing on this blog?" (Oops--internal monologue leak. Must sleep.)

Monkeys everywhere. I just remembered that the song that probably got my friends' band signed to a record label is a remake called "Monkey Magic." And that sounds like a nice thought for a title for this pathetic and delirious and oh so belated entry. The second entry in three to make some mention of monkeys. Perhaps I should designate May as Monkey Awareness Month. So all you loyal and patient and impatient readers out there, send in your monkey stories, links, and trivia! Or something. I wonder how much monkeys sleep?

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Poor Tony - come back to America so we can pamper you with infusions of BlueDew, TacoBell and peanut butter - though preferrably not all at once.

ldmiller said...

Yo Hack, I got your monkey trivia right here:

1. What is the name of the "curious" monkey, accompanied by the Man in the Yellow Hat, in a series of stories by H. A. and Margret Rey? a-Joe, b-Osborn, c-Bill, d-George.

2. In what movie was the heroine carried away by a pack of winged monkeys? a-"The Wizard of Oz," b-"The Blue Bird," c-"The Sound of Music," d-"Alice in Wonderland."

3. The proboscis monkey, found in the Philippines, has a larger than normal what? a-Nose, b-Head, c-Tail, d-Liver.

4. What was the only film to feature the 1960s pop group, The Monkees? a-"Help," b-"The Holy Grail," c-"Head," d-"Feeling Groovy."

5. What comedy team played stowaways aboard a cruise ship in the 1931 movie "Monkey Business"? a-Rowan and Martin, b-Lewis and Martin, c-The Ritz Brothers, d-The Marx Brothers.

6. What action star's films include "Die Hard," "Armageddon," and "12 Monkeys"? a-Brad Pitt, b-Arnold Schwarzenegger, c-Bruce Willis, d-Sylvester Stallone.

7. What was the name of the Tennessee teacher involved in the 1925 "Monkey Trial" for teaching evolution in school? a-John Scopes, b-Alphonse Daudet, c-Edwin Hornbeck, d-Robert Fitzroy.

8. What Disney hero had a monkey named Abu? a-Hercules, b-Aladdin, c-Peter Pan, d-Pinocchio.

9. On the Chinese calendar, the last Year of the Monkey was 1992. When is the next? a-2002, b-2003, c-2004, d-2005.

10. What American novelist published the collection of short stories Welcome to the Monkey House? a-Kurt Vonnegut Jr., b-John Updike, c-Ray Bradbury, d-John Irving.

Of course I stole it from the web, but it is still good Monkey trivia. I kept the answer key secret and will reveal it at a later time. BTW, your stream-of-conscience blogs are the best, and I wished you wrote more about the Baloon Butt Clown.

Hack said...

That is monkey magnificent. Much obliged.

Anonymous said...

you want monkeys? I'll give you your frickin monkeys. Click the link then click the first landlord file. Yeah, you know what what I'm talking about.

http://siflnolly.alluvium.com/calls.html

oh yeah, the seagull ate MY sister! Suckers!

ldmiller said...

Saw Karl this week at graduation and he wanted me to send you a big hello. Oh and the people at the bank call me Sam, suckers!